I don’t regret meeting you, I just hate that I got too attached.
I remember when it was really difficult getting over my EX. I felt so comfortable around her and I didnt wanna let go of that. But I had to, and so I tried forcing myself to like other girls. When they rejected me, I honestly didn’t feel anything and so I continued to chase after my EX again. I realized, two years later that I was only hurting myself. So I spent a year away from her, no communication what-so-ever and enjoyed life. That was until I met another girl in my senior year, whom I had no attraction to at first. I’ve been known for my impeccable timing because I fell for her at the end of my senior year. We texted each other non-stop over the summer. I felt like i was in another relationship, but this one had boundaries. I couldn’t say things normal couples could say to the other. Nor could i hold her, or cuddle with her like other couples could.
We fell apart when she moved away. We talked less and less until it was month after month that I would text her for a couple hours and then it died off. When she finally texted me to hang out, I rushed out of the house and into my car, driving over 80 miles an hour. When I finally saw her walking down the sidewalk, my heart skipped a beat. It felt like the many dreams I had about her. Half of the day, we spent talking about relationships and she was ready for another one, but she didn’t want to deal with all the B.S that came with it. I completely agreed with her because that was exactly how I felt about it too. I even told her that I was scared that I might hurt the girl with my rage. But her reply was: You can’t do that to yourself, you have to take a chance.
I’m not sure if she was hinting me that she had feelings for me, but I was usually wrong about these things in the past. So I brushed off this assumption and continued with my day with her. But now I regret not asking her if she had these feelings, because I keep thinking about her and how great a time we had together. I get jealous when other guys are with her, or even flirt with her up in UCSD. I haven’t felt this strongly for a girl since 4 years ago. Hopefully, when I see her again, I will ask… I hope it isnt too late. Valentines Day is coming, so maybe that will be the perfect time.